Refocus

I've decided on a lot of things the past couple of days. Something about massive amounts of family around will do that to you. My mom's mom, dad's mom and aunt were all here for Thanksgiving which was fun for everyone-especially the kids. Gram and Auntie kind of dive right into baby care. Within minutes of unpacking Lily, Jake and Evie, they are on the floor with them playing, or pushing them around the backyard in toy cars. Needless to say, Lily has slept in past 9:00 every morning they've been here.

I digress. I've decided that my personal well-being, physically, mentally and emotionally are extremely important. I've decided that I will make every effort to build a fantastic relationship with any family member interested. I've decided that the alone time Lily and I get will be the best mother-daughter time I can manage. This, of course, will be much easier once I am more mobile. In the meantime, I will sing, play and boogie along with her to the best of my ability.

I missed a good solid month of her life. That's a pretty large chunk right now, but in another year it will be a small blip on the radar. She waited to walk until I could see her. The only new word she picked up is "uh-oh". She stopped using a pacifier and a bottle. On the other hand, she maintained the words she had uttered before the accident-I still think her first words are "thank you"...very polite child! Also, she has saved the joys of teething for me. Thanks, Lil.

But looking forward, I know she will be able to wax nostalgic over her childhood. She will have memories of her mommy playing games, teaching her songs, reading books and creating art and imaginary worlds. I will be that mommy. The one that relishes life and will pass that onto her daughter.

What can you get for $25?

Apparently, that is all it costs to get out of a traffic ticket given for hitting a car, killing the passenger and critically injuring the driver. Well, that's all it cost the woman that hit me.

Drama

We've had all sorts of drama going on around here lately. I'll choose to focus on the drama that really affects me...Lily drama.

The other night, she woke up around midnight and talked and talked and talked for about an hour and a half. Then she kind of fussed a bit and slept and fussed a bit and slept. Around 2:45 am, she started wailing. By this time, I was already up in my wheelchair to go get her. I opened up her door and she just got quiet and still. She reached down to get her bunny she sleeps with and then waited patiently for me to get across the room to her. When I put her in my lap, she clutched my pajamas so tightly and buried her face into my shoulder. I decided to bring her to my bed to see if she would sleep...just like the old days when she was learning how to nap!

I think she understands that mommy does not move as easily as she used to, because she held tightly to me and did not wiggle while I maneuvered back to the guest room (I'm still in this transitional bed) Once I laid down next to her, all the tension left her body and she went limp. She slept, unmoving, for almost four hours straight. I didn't sleep too much, though. I was pretty wistful about days gone by and what I could have missed if things had been a bit different the day of the accident.

Tonight, we went to my nephew's fourth birthday party. Lily threw up twice while we were there. First time ever for her. Yipee. The bonus for me on this one is that I can't get into the room very quickly to check on her if she throws up again overnight. Looks like this stomach bug is daddy duty!

Halloween

Lily is a lamb, Evie a duck, and Jake is the cowboy.





































I hope thes two will always have this much fun together...
and that Jake will always look out for his little cousin...